Physics is hard. Actually, I’m embarrassed to admit that Algebra is hard. Seriously, for the most part I get the concepts. Opposite charged particles attract, like charges repel. Forces acting at an angle are decomposed into x and y components. Current running through a circuit is a function of voltage and resistance V = IR (and any charged capacitors present if you want to get fancy). But you know what kills me? Remembering how to add fractions with variables present. I. Am. Math. Stupid.
So I’ve never found math particularly fun. It’s useful in lab for making solutions and I’ve found myself occasionally using it at home for budgeting and measuring equivalents in the kitchen. But c’mon!! How many folks have used anything beyond completely elementary algebra unless they were building something structural or making fancy repair parts for some machine (ehem, DAD you don’t count). When was the last time you needed to add (1/x3/2 + 2/x4 )??? (BTW, I had to look up exponent rules w/hubby to solve this…. x2/3 + 2(x-4) is as simplified as it gets. I think.) And who the heck uses sin and cos to determine angles in their everyday life???
My brain operates on the “Use it or Loose it” rule. Sometimes I get the feeling mental capacity is limited, so whenever something new comes along that I need to know, out goes something I used to know but no longer use. Talking with some intelligent people I know, I get the feeling this isn’t all that uncommon. I’m beginning to suspect that the only thing different about those extra-obnoxiously smart people is their ability to keep MORE of the info they once learn on mental-hand, all the time. Ever been around someone with photographic-ish memory? It’s really annoying. In this day and age of informational bombardment, I think our brains are re-wiring to have lots of info coming and going with very little of it “sticking”. Who needs to (or wants to!) remember what Kim Kardashian is up to five years from now? But that’s not so good for someone going back to school. Or who wants to be a research professor. I NEED information to stick for the long term.
Unfortunately is stuff like this that inevitably makes me question my ability to be successful in research/academia/career. I’m constantly surrounded by brilliant people, lots of whom I’ve seen struggle for exactly the kind of career I think I want. Some days I believe I can do it – with more training and the focus brought by working towards a personal goal, I know I can solve meaningful questions and write good grants and WANT to be in lab for 10hrs a day. Other days, I feel like a moron who doesn’t have the mental capacity nor work ethic to handle the incredibly competitive environment that is academic research.
Physics makes me feel like a moron.
